Life is better with friends
Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones
Solomon, 1000 B.C., Proverbs 16:24
Our final platter in the Healthy Mind Platter series this week is Connecting Time – The Healing Power of Relationships. I’ve saved the best treat for last – the dessert on our mind diet.
Social connections are a basic human need the same as water, food and shelter. Social dislocation is as physically painful as any illness or injury. So, it’s important to cultivate as many social connections as you can and nurture them throughout your life.
There is nothing quite like the connection with a good friend that you have known for years. It feels like a comfortable pair of well-worn shoes – smooth, easy and pleasant and most of all no blisters! You feel as if you can share your life’s joys and sorrows and there will be no judgement or criticism. You don’t always agree about everything but somehow there is acceptance of your differences. There often isn’t the obligation that comes with family. I have a smile on my face as I write this while thinking about my friendship network.
Many scientific studies reveal that social support is reliably related to beneficial effects on aspects of the cardiovascular, endocrine and immune systems. This means positive effects on heart reactivity, blood pressure and depression and can even mean lower mortality.
Most of all good social connections lower stress which is the main reason it is included in the Healthy Mind Platter. Oxytocin is the hormone that is released in the brain when we connect with good friends and this can create the feelings of trust, empathy and generosity.
If you are feeling stressed prior to an important business meeting and you have the time, it may help to catch up for a coffee and chat with a friend. This will lower your stress hormone cortisol and increase your oxytocin which will hopefully allow the meeting to run smoothly.
In the Neuroleadership Journal Vol Six March 2015, An Ideal Hormone Profile for Leadership, Josh Davis and Pranjal H. Mehta conclude that high testosterone, low cortisol and appropriate levels of oxytocin is the ideal hormone profile for the best decisions of leaders.
So, the coffee and chat with your friend will lower your cortisol and increase your oxytocin. On the way back from your coffee and chat, do your power poses to raise your testosterone and your business meeting will be a breeze. If you’re not sure about power poses have a look at Amy Cuddy’s Ted Talk- Fake it Till You Make It. https://www.youtube.com/
Life can be busy and from my experience, social connections can be the first causality of that busyness. Try not to let this happen because the busyness will be more easily managed when you take the time to connect with your social networks.
Indulge in social connections – the dessert for your mind and if the scientists are right you will have a long, happy and successful life.
Remember all of this and much, much more is provided in my Women’s Empowerment and Leadership Program. The next program is on 10th and 11th May, 2018.
